The Path of Least Resistence

Wow, it has certainly been a long time. A long, long time.

I was at my mother's house over Thanksgiving, and she asked me why I had stopped blogging. I thought about it for a minute, but I really didn't have a good answer. I would like to blame time. Time seems like a good scapegoat. I'm just too busy sounds like a good answer, but really, it's not.

Like it or not, time is going to keep moving along with it's own agenda. It doesn't care how busy we are, or how tired we are, or even how lonely we are. It's job, it's sole purpose is......to continue. To move along so to speak.

That is kind of where I am now. I am just moving along. Floating down time's river feeling as helpless as a leaf in the wind. I work, I eat, I sleep....repeat... Hopefully one day I will find myself.

The kids are growing older by the day. Innocence is fading away much faster than I hoped. Both boys are great kids, and I am very proud of each. Christopher is brave and stubborn, and I like to think I see a lot of myself in him. Aidan is sweet and manipulative, and too smart for his own good. He certainly takes after his mother more than me.

It seems so strange to me that two kids from the same parents can be so different. I guess is shouldn't. My brother and I are not very alike either. He is much quieter and much smaller than me, but he was born with that same Thornton "argument" gene. We can debate with the best of them, and Christopher and Aidan are well on their way to filling our shoes.

I am really tired right now, so I will move on. Hopefully this weekend with bring good weather, and good blogging.

William

Surprise

I bet you thought I forgot about this blog. Nope.....not at all. I have been smothered as far as writing goes, but I believe a small window is coming up. I have lots of pictures to post of my two favorite people in the whole world, and I'm going to try to post a long blog over the weekend. Life is OK. Just kinda going through the motions right now on a personal level. Not very motivated to explore......Seems unfulfilling.

Anyway, talk to you soon.

William

Tired

Work is absolutely kicking my booty. I am at the office and on job sites approximately 10 hours a day. Add to that a 1 hour and 15 minute commute to the office and another back home. Once I get home, add an additional 2 hours on average of work at home at night, and what do you get? 15+ hours every day devoted to my work. Ouch, no wonder I'm a walking Zombie.

One thing about it, no one will ever accuse me again of being lazy and "unmotivated". Ridiculous.

The blog has suffered, and for that I'm sorry. Hopefully after a while, my mind and body will adjust to the extreme demands placed upon it right now, and I will eventually have more time to write.

I can dream......

William

Echo

One year. A whole year. It's hard to believe.

One year ago this week I was forced to move out of the house that I shared with my best friend and our two wonderful children. I wish I could say that everything is better now, and I was over the shock of the situation, but that would be a lie. Sure, I love my weeks with the boys. I love their laughter, their inquisitiveness, their challenge. They are the light of my life, and their well being is what drives me each and every day.

With that said, I still miss all of the other stuff. Sharing part of my life and my soul always made me feel complete. I know that sentence contradicts itself, but there is no other way to describe that feeling of belonging. The feeling like you are always in the right place.

I work and I socialize and I try to do things to help me forget how wonderful my life was, but so far I have not come close to filling the void that was left when Lori decided she no longer wanted me in her life. It's hard to explain. It's like standing on the edge of the Grand Canyon and yelling at the top of your lungs. You stand back with hopeful anticipation, patiently waiting for your echo to serenade you from the other side. Except in this case, the echo never arrives. You look around....pause.......and you think "how is that even possible".

William

Bittersweet

A little over a month ago, a woman in a 2013 Altima decided it would be a good idea to try to turn into a Walmart parking lot without looking for cross traffic.  I was headed northbound in my truck going about 45 mph and didn't even really have time to put on my breaks.  Luckily for her, I did have time to swerve to the right and I made contact with her car right in front of her front passenger tire instead of directly T-boning her.  Her 7 year old daughter was in the back seat on the passenger side, it if I would have T-boned her, the results would have been devastating.  As it turned out, my truck ripped off her entire front end past the tires, and her car was instantly totaled.   My truck was damaged, but at the time, it did not look totaled.  She admitted fault, but she used an insurance company that was unknown to both me and all the police officers at the scene.  Because of this, I decided to just let my insurance company handle my claim.  I knew I would have to pay the deductible, but I would recover it plus interest when State Farm collected their money through subrogation.

After two weeks, I was told that my truck would be fixed.  I was happy.  I had owned my truck for 14 years, and it was in fantastic condition before the wreck.  I just wanted it back.  Fast forward another two weeks, and I get another call, this time letting me know that they discovered that the frame was cracked, and it would now be totaled.  I was not happy.  I figured that would get screwed with the settlement, and I would miss that truck.

I purchased Old Blue in May of 2000.  Brand new Wedgewood Blue F150 Supercrew Lariat 4x4.  At the time it had every option, and the MSRP. was a tad over 35K.  I think I paid 32K out the door at the time.  I put 155K miles on that truck, and never once did it fail to start when I put the key in the ignition.  Other than routine maintenance, it never made or needed a trip to the mechanic.   It was rock solid for 14 years, and I kept it in very nice condition. 

After finding out it was totaled, I was prepared to fight with State Farm.  Instead, I was a bit surprised at what they offered.  Without haggling, I was offer $10,900 as a settlement price.  For it being a 14 year old truck with 150+ miles, I thought that was more than fair.  I accepted, and picked up my check the next day.

Now, I owned two F150s in a row, and loved both.  Both were totaled in wrecks that were not my fault, and I walked away without a scratch each time.  I wanted another F150.  I got in touch with 1ags, and he gave me his contact's information.  I tried to get close to what I had in options on Old Blue, but doing so made the price of a new one more than I could spend.  I'm a "all the bells and whistles" kind of guy, and there was no way I could afford a new F150 with all of those things.  I searched for other options.  I finally found an acceptable alternative, and I made a deal and picked up a new vehicle last week.  Here it is:

2014 Nissan Frontier Pro-4X in Metallic Blue.  It has every option they offer, and then some.  Leather, sunroof, navigation, bluetooth, Sat radio, skid plates, bilstein shocks, hill descent, sonar, reverse camera, Rockford Fosgate 10 speaker system, factory spray in bed liner with a their Utili-track system, roof rack, ect.  Everything!  

Rest in peace Old Blue.  Losing you was like losing an old friend.  We had some great memories.  Thanks for always getting me home.  I will miss you.

William

Slammed

No, I have not quit blogging.  I know it seems that way.  I'm sorry for the lack of updates.  I started a new job on Monday, and I have been slammed.  I hope to maybe get time on Sunday evening.  Again, thanks for being patient. 

William

Giddy

Sorry it's been a while since an update.  I will have a long one after this weekend.  The boys and I are going to Galveston this afternoon and coming back on Memorial Day.  This combined with a visit to Grandma's house last weekend should make for a lot to write about.  I'm looking forward to it.

William

Risen

Well here it is, Saturday morning, and it sure is quite around here.  No kiddos this weekend, so I'm a bit bummed.  At least I will get to see them in a couple of hours during Christopher's soccer game.  I am certainly looking forward to that.

Last weekend I did have the boys, and we had lots of fun.  The fun started on Friday night.  It was Little League Baseball night at the Frisco Roughriders ball park.   Tickets included all you could eat Brats, Hot Dogs, Nachos, and Fountain Drinks.  Yummy!

We sat with Aidan's baseball team, and had really good seats.  As a matter of fact, we were right next to the Roughriders bull pen, so we got to watch the pitchers warm up from just a few feet away.  The boys were amazed at how hard the pitchers threw the ball.   The Roughriders won the game, and the park had an awesome firework show afterward.  We all had a great time.

Saturday, we played outside, and the boys helped me do yard work.  After that, we went shopping and then sat down on Saturday night to watch the newest Hobbit movie on my 3D TV.  We cranked up the 7.1 THX surround sound, and watched the Desolation of Smaug.  It was really good.  I still can't get over how incredible the picture is on my Samsung TV.  Just beautiful. 

The boys were super tired after the movie, and both fell asleep on the couch.

Sunday morning was Easter.  Easter has always been very special to Lori, so I called her last week and asked if she would like to see the boys on Easter even though it was not her weekend.  She jumped at the chance, so we headed over to her house on Easter morning.  She made us a nice breakfast, and then he boys had their Easter egg hunt.  Like always, the were super excited, and finding eggs right out of the gate. 

The both made out like bandits.

We had a really nice time celebrating Easter with Lori. 

After we left Lori's house on Sunday afternoon, we had a pretty quite time the rest of the day.  We stayed around the house mostly, and I cooked a nice Easter dinner.  All in all it was a wonderful Easter weekend.

William

P.S.  Tuesday for my first time to attempt a Prime Rib Roast.  I marinated it overnight, and then put it in the oven on convection at 215 degrees for 3 hours.  It turned out fantastic!  I was so proud of it, I took a picture of the outcome.

Delicious!!!!!

One Year And I'ts Still Surreal

It's really hard to believe that this coming Friday will mark the one year anniversary of my dream life coming to an end.  I am still left in a haze when I think about what has transpired over the last 365 days of my life.  I really don't think I will ever lose that feeling of disbelief.  The scars run deep and the pain I'm afraid, will follow me to my grave.

Not a day goes by that I don't think about what might have been.  What a wonderful life and family I once shared.  I love the boys will all my heart, and I try harder than ever to make them happy and fulfilled, but it's not the same.  It's hard to describe.  The boys, as strong as they are, feel it too.  There is just a void that lingers.......that permeates each day.  You try so hard as a single parent to distract the kids as much as possible to keep that void suppressed, but there are times.....certain instances, that invoke memories of a better time.  The emptiness that you feel during those times is difficult and sad.

I certainly hope that one day I will be able to make it through a day or a night without thinking or dreaming about my marriage to Lori, and the wonderful "family" we created and shared.  Everybody tells me that eventually I will be at peace with what has transpired, and time will wash away any pain and grief.  I hope they are right I guess, but forgetting about the dream that I worked all my life to obtain seems..............unfair.  I guess time is merciless for a reason.

On to better things:

The boys are enjoying the school year, and growing like weeds.  Not only are they physically growing, but mentally they are maturing faster that I could imagine.  Aidan is as smart as a whip, and I am constantly in awe of how easy he seems to absorb and process complex issues and problems.  He has a drive when it comes to learning, even at 11,  that I wish I would have had at any point in my life.  Christopher is also becoming more and more aware of his abilities.  He is reading way past his age, and something recently seems to have clicked when it comes to his studies and understanding what is needed to succeed.  If we can just get him to "like" school, instead of just "going" to school, than the sky is the limit. 

Both boys make me immensely proud, not matter what they are doing.  The are both polite, well spoken, and handsome.   Combine those attributes with their intelligence, athleticism and compassion, and you can understand why I think they both have very bright futures ahead of them.  I'm glad I have a front row seat. 

Last weekend I took the boys to see Captain America:  The Winter Soldier in IMAX 3D.  It was fantastic, and we all really, really enjoyed the movie.  We can't wait for the next one.  On the way out of the theater, I snapped a quick picture of my two favorite super heroes!

I really love the boys.......and I can't wait for our next adventure together.

William

P.S.  Again, I'm sorry for the delay in posting.  I'll do better.

Tardy

Sorry I have been tardy with my latest blog.  I should have one churned out in the next day or so.  Thanks for sticking with me.

William

Boys, Beaches, Battleships, and Bonding

As I mentioned in my last post, the boys and I shared spring break together this year. It was certainly a bit different that what we have experienced in the past, but we made the most of our time, and really had lots of fun.

We left for Temple late Friday night. I always try to leave late to avoid some of the crazy traffic that now seems routine on I35. While it wasn't stop and go traffic that we encountered, it was still bumper to bumper most of the 162 mile journey. Traffic was moving about 70mph, which is good, but being bumper to bumper for the duration makes the stress quotient extremely high. I was very happy once we arrived and I could sit down and calm my nerves. We all went to bed pretty soon after arriving, and looked forward to seeing Grandma and Uncle Jim the following morning.

We woke up Saturday morning around 8:00am, and it was sure nice to see mom (Grandma). Once again, it had been far too long since we had been down for a visit. Jim arrived around 11:00 that morning, and we spent the day playing outside in her backyard, and playing various board games. It was really nice to relax and laugh with the extended family again.

Sunday was spent doing pretty much the same thing, and the boys and I really had a good time. After lunch, I the boys and I slipped away for a 1/2 hour or so, and took the Radio Controlled vehicles that Grandma got them for Christmas down to the parking lot of the church a block away for some fun.

I really enjoyed watching them run around and laugh as they were piloting their respective vehicles.

Monday morning came too quickly, and we were all sad to leave Temple.  We had a great time visiting with Grandma and Uncle Jim, and can't wait for our next trip down.

After leaving Grandma's house about 10:00 on Monday morning, we headed to Galveston.  My good friends Kenny and Hailey offered to let me use their beach house during spring break, and we were all eager to take them up on their offer.

The trip to Galveston went smoothly.  We dropped our stuff off at the beach house, and headed back into town to get groceries for the week.  By the time we got back to the beach house, it was about 6:00pm, and almost time to start dinner.  Here is a shot of the beach house just before I rolled out the grill to start cooking some yummy steaks. 

Of course Thunder was super excited about the new surroundings too!

While I cooked, the boys played on the hammock.

We ate dinner on the deck, and enjoyed the ocean breeze.  After dinner, we watched some TV, and then called it an early night.  We were all pretty tired from all the driving.  Want proof?  Well.....

Tuesday morning we woke up about 8:00am and had some breakfast.  We took the golf cart for a morning drive, and hit the marina and the beach to check out the water.  It was still early and a bit chilly, so we were still in our sweat pants and long sleeve shirts.  The water was cold, but that did not deter the mentally ill boys from going wading in their sweats and getting soaked.  Thunder jumped right on lunatic train with the boys, and was soon soaking wet too.  Me.......well lets just say that I did not have to immediately change when I got home.

After eating lunch, we loaded up the truck and headed to the part of West End beach where they let you drive right up to the water.  We parked Old Blue (my truck), and as I unpacked the back, the boys and the dog made a bee line to the water.  Check that........that should read the crisp 58 degree water.  Brrrrrr............

The boys and the dog did not seem to mind the frigid temperatures, and maybe I'm just old, but it was too chilly for me.  I had just as good of a time just watching them laugh and have fun.  This was Thunder's first time at the ocean, and he was as happy as a fish in water.

Normally, on a dog's first time to the ocean, they will drink the salt water in the ocean from simply not knowing any better.  It usually results in a one day bout of diarrhea and throwing up.  I am proud to say that Thunder knew better, and did not get sick the entire time we were there.  Dante and Mystic were not so fortunate when I took them for their first times.  I was ecstatic that I did not have to clean anything up this time.

Wednesday arrived with a 35-40 mph wind.  To go along with that insane wind, were tempatures in the mid 60's.  Using my keen sense of deductive reasoning, I made an executive decision to forgo the beach and take the boys on an adventure instead.

We headed out to the port of Houston, where the USS. Texas Battleship is docked.  After stopping in La Porte, TX at Whataburger for lunch, we got to the Battleship around noon.  The boys and I were silly with excitement.

The whole experience is very neat.  You get to walk and climb wherever you want on the ship.  There is lots of history to read about, and the ship itself is a beautiful museum.  Needless to say, the boys had a blast.

What a great experience.  Oh, and about that wind............

Ferocious

About a 1/2 mile away is the San Jacinto Monument and museum.  We left the battleship, and headed over to the museum.  Wow, what a great educational experience.  We watched a nice 20 minute HD movie in their theater about the famous battle, and then went 590 feet up to the observation deck.  It was quite the site.

Yep, that's the battleship off in the distance.  Fun times!

We got back to the beach house around 5:30pm and just spent time riding scooters, and playing.  After dinner under the stars again, we watched some TV and went to bed fairly early.

On Thursday, we headed home from our adventure.  I believe everybody had a really good time.  Different that what we were used to in the past?  Well, no doubt.......but fun nonetheless.

Thanks boys for making my life better, and for keeping me young.

William

C'est La Vie

I was married to the love of my life 16 years ago today. It, along with the births of my children are the three happiest days of my life. It's weird to me that 3-14 is just another day on the calendar, now that Lori and I are divorced. Strange. Oh well..........I'll pour myself a drink later, and lift a glass to happier times.

George Bernard Shaw once said:

"There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart's desire. The other is to gain it.”

He's right.......I've experienced both.

William



PS. Just got back from Spring Break. I should have lots of pictures to post within the next few days. It was certainly a fun week.

Breaking For Spring

After school today, Spring Break officially starts for the two monkeys. Since this is an even numbered year, I am supposed to have both boys for the entire time. Wow, it feels just as weird typing that, as it does saying it. Anyway, I'm really excited about spending so much time with my two favorite people in the whole world.

Now, I wish I could say that I was whisking them away to some fantastic tropical beach somewhere. I sure wish I had the funds to do that. I don't. Maybe 2016? Who knows...... Nope, this year we are going to Temple to see Mom and Jim tonight, and staying through Monday morning. On Monday, we are going to pack up ol' Blue (my truck) and head down to Galveston. My friends have offer me the beach house for the week, and if the weather cooperates, it should be fun. We are going to stay until Thursday morning, and then head back to Little Elm.

Once back, I have decided to let Lori have the boys for Thursday and Friday. I am under no obligation to do so, but I am doing it out of my love for the boys. I know they will miss their mom after not seeing her for a week. She will give them back to me on Saturday morning, after Aidan's first baseball tournament game.

It will sure be a different spring break than any of us have ever experienced. It will be awkward at times, not having "mommy" around. It, like everything else will get better with time.

I will take plenty of pictures. Smiles all around!

William

Spring Is In The Air

I had the kids last weekend, and we were blessed with great weather for a change.  Hopefully all of that cold miserable snowy weather is behind us until next winter. 

We woke up early on Saturday morning to get to Aidan's basketball game by 8:00am.  Yes, 8:00am.  I know what you are thinking "who in the world schedules games that early"....you know what.......I was thinking the very same thing.  Wow, it's tough to get the boys up on a Saturday that early.   Lately though, it's gotten a bit easier.  I just lift Thunder up in their beds, and the wet dog kisses that follow do the job quicker than any other method I have tried.  Once they got up, we all had our wake up showers, a little breakfast, and off we went.

 Basketball was fun, and Aidan's team won in overtime for the second week in a row.  The boys are having a whole bunch of fun, and the team is 6-1 right now.  Pretty cool.

After basketball, we had just enough time to get home and get Christopher changed for his first soccer game of the season.  His team tied 2-2 but it was fun watching him play.  Christopher is growing taller and getting skinnier. Pretty much just the opposite of his dad.........grrrrrrr.   Anyway, you can sure tell the difference in his running this season.  He is much quicker, and no longer gets "catches" in his sides. 

After the soccer game, I had to rush to get Aidan to a birthday party.  The party was being held at a local paintball range.  The boys spent 3 hours decked out in full paintball regalia shooting restlessly at each other.  Aidan came home with 11 really nasty black and blue bruises all over his body, and a big smile on his face.  The boys had a blast. 

While Aidan was playing colorful warrior, Christopher and I hit up the local Popeye's Louisiana Chicken house.  It was Christopher's first time eating chicken on the bone, and he loved it.  After we left the restaurant, we came home and got into a heated game of saving the world in MARVEL Super Heroes Lego on Playstation. 

We had just enough time after Aidan's paintball excursion to get him changed into his baseball practice uniform, and get him over to baseball practice.  Whew, it was a long.....busy day. 

After baseball practice, we had dinner and then watched Despicable Me 2.  It was fun, and we had a great time.

Sunday we woke up a little later, and I made the boys pancakes.  After pancakes, we went to the lake to let Thunder frolic.  We all had fun.

After we left the lake, we stopped by a local water skiing park and watched to brave souls in the 55 degree water.  Some were pretty stinking good!

We spent the rest of the day playing around the house.  Everybody was plenty tired at bedtime, and Thunder was ready to crash with this buddy Christopher.

He is a cutie.

Friendship

I have many regrets in my life about a multitude of things.  The list is entirely too long for someone as young as I am, but that's life, and dwelling on those regrets is foolish.  There is one area in my life that is free from regret, and I have been more than blessed with my choices.  What is this area you ask?  Why friendship of course.

I have been lucky when it comes to friends.  I have been able to establish life long bonds with some of the most wonderful people you would ever want to meet.  Calling myself blessed is an understatement.

In the last year, I have probably relied on those friends more that necessary, but each and every time I needed help, eager volunteers were always just a phone call away.    I was always met with a simple "how can I help" without hesitation.   No man could ask for more.

I have made a point my entire life to keep the fires of friendship stoked, and keeping those bonds warm, active, and alive has always been on of my chief goals.  They say you can tell the quality of a man by the friends he chooses.  I really hope that's true, for it places me among the very elite.

About 4 years ago, I started a tradition of inviting good friends over on Super Bowl Sunday to celebrate the day with food and fun.  We start early in the morning, firing up the smoker, and seasoning 6 racks of the best pork baby back ribs on the planet.  This year was no exception, and many of my friends and their families helped continue this tradition at my new house. 

After seasoning the ribs and making a big pitcher of the best Bloody Mary's you ever tasted, we sit out by the smoker, and just enjoy each others company. 

This year we started about 9:30 in the morning.  Most years this would be done in the back yard, but inclement weather this year forced some changes.  I brought everything around to the front of the house, shielded from the North Wind, and we made good use of the garage.  While the smoker sat in the driveway outside in 14 degree temperatures under a canopy, we stayed in the garage enjoying each others company, as well as the toasty table top heater.

We drank Bloody Marys, played darts, possibly had had a cigar or two,  all while checking on the meat in the smoker every 30 minutes or so.  Because of the extra cold weather, my normal cooking time went from 4 1/2 hours to 6 1/2 hours.  This worked out perfectly, and the ribs were finished just in time to eat before kickoff.

Like I said earlier, it was wonderful to have so many of my friends and their families come by to spend the afternoon at my house.  The weather was awful, with freezing rain and a mix of snow to go along with the brutally cold temps.  They could have easily had a way "out", but all decided to make it anyway.  Like I said, I am blessed.

I wish the game would have been better, but I can assure you that everyone had a good time regardless.  I hope this tradition will continue for many years.

Later in the week, we were once again blessed (or cursed depending on how you look at it) with snow.  It was really cold, and most everyone I know was uncomfortable being outside.  Most, with one exception I should add............

Yep, you guessed it.........Thunder!   This was the first time that he saw snow, and wow did he have a good time.  It was hard to keep him inside.  He would just stand and whimper at the back door when I brought him inside.  I was afraid his young puppy paws would get frost bite.

Thunder is growing by the day, and I am so happy to have him.  He has really helped fill a void in my life, and I am grateful.  He is a full fledged puppy right now, so most of the time my carpet looks like this......

That's the remnants of the Star Wars Storm Trooper dog toy the boys picked out two days before.  I'm surprised it lasted two days to be honest.  He is one energy filled, sharp puppy teeth chewing machine.  It's easy to get upset with him, until he turns and gives you this look.....

Who could stay mad at that face for long?

William

All Good Things Must Come To An End

Lori's awful divorce was made official earlier today, and I am now a single dad.  Single.  Never in a million years would I (or anyone for that matter) have predicted that word would ever be applied to me again after March 14th, 1998. Everybody knew I was in our marriage it until my last breath, no matter what.

I will never in my lifetime understand what Lori was thinking, or why this happened.  A person is not supposed to change so drastically after spending 16 years so deeply in love.  It was certainly not right, and my confusion and pain will never go away.

It's a damn shame that the children and I will both have to carry this scar for our remaining lives.  I am lucky I guess, for my time left on earth is paltry compared to theirs.  I hate that they will wonder until their dying days how their lives would have been different if we would have remained together.  No, I don't believe for a minute it will possess them, but I do believe the thought will creep into their lives at various times to cast doubt.

Lori will tell you that her divorce has no bearing at all on how they grow up, but that's laughable.  Christopher and Aidan are both great kids, but to think they are ultimately better off being raised half the time by one or the other of their birth parents, is an exercise in justification.  It's simply not true.  Lori can tell you until her last breath that she made the right decision, but make no mistake, it was done for her and her alone, and unfortunately for the kids, short sighted and selfish. 

Me, well I will continue to live my life as I always have.  I cannot change who I am.....nor should I.

I believe Rudyard Kipling said it best:

“I always prefer to believe the best of everybody; it saves so much trouble” 

William

Catching up

It seems like the new year is flying by.  It's hard to believe January is almost gone.  I think the main reason it is going so fast for me, is the addition of Thunder to my life.

It's no secret that I have had a hard time adjusting to the loneliness of my current life.  Like I've always said, I am a family man.  I am most at ease surrounded by my children and a loving and caring wife.  With that being nothing more than a fading distant memory, I needed something to help me feel wanted and needed.  I am happy to say that I have found a wonderful companion to help me in these tough times.  Yes, he is an absolute menace right now at 11 weeks old, requiring constant attention, but I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I need him just as much as he needs me.  When you have a partnership like that, nothing but good happens.  I can't wait to see what adventures are in store for us.  It's going to be fun.

As I have told you in the past, Aidan is playing YMCA winter REC basketball.  It is the first time he has ever played basketball, and I've got to tell you, it's been fun.  I have enjoyed watching him play almost as much as he has enjoyed being on the court.  The team is 3-1 with 3 games remaining.  I don't think basketball will take the place of baseball in Aidan's heart, but I know he is having fun, and that's a wonderful thing for a dad to see.

Christopher is growing bigger and smarter each and every day.  I love helping him with his homework on the days that I have him, and as a parent, there is nothing better than to hear your kids read out loud to you.  Christopher's reading has really taken off, and on the nights that I have him, he reads to me for a minimum of 20 minutes before he goes to bed.  I wouldn't trade those 20 minutes for anything.

Aidan has been enjoying his classes this year.  He has some challenging subjects, but he like I have said in the past, he is exceptionally smart.  I am so very proud of the young man he is becoming.  I see great things in his future.  Creative and smart is a good combination.  The sky is the limit.

I am surviving.  I am no where near the point where I want to be right now, but each day I'm better than the last.  Eventually, I will find my place, and forget about the mistakes I made in the past.  I have wonderful, smart, polite,  beautiful children, that I adore.  They are my reason for living, and proof that the last 17 years of my life weren't wasted.  Beauty abounds.  You just have to find it.

God Bless

William