For the very first time since I became a father, tonight marks the first time that I won't get to go trick or treating with my children. I can't begin to tell you how sad and resentful that makes me. I live for little family things like that. Halloween just happens to fall on a Thursday this year, which is Lori's day with the kids, so I'm out of luck.
It probably doesn't seem like much to most, but it's hard to find a more jovial time in a child's life, The boys get to dress up as cool characters, and knock on people's doors for gobs and gobs of candy. How cool is that? It's always been a blast being part of that, and I'm really going to miss it. Sad.
Happy Halloween Boys.
Thursday, October 31, 2013
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
The Gian Lorenzo Bernini of Pumpkins!
One of the things that I have always done for the boys is to make them a special Jack O Lantern each Halloween. When I asked Christopher last week what he wanted, well......lets just say he did not pick the easiest subject. He said that he wanted Minions. Yes Minions like the ones in the movie Despicable Me. Well shoot, after looking at a few pictures online, I knew that I had my work cut out for me.
I picked up the pumpkin on Sunday, and after picking up the boys on Monday afternoon from school, we picked out the pattern that would define our masterpiece. After spending at least an hour just creating that image on the pumpkin, we were ready to begin our adventure.
Feeling like Bernini with a block of Marble, I carefully chose my tools. Normally, a small pumpkin saw would do the trick, but not this year. No, no no no no.....this beast would require a Dremel and my clay sculpting tools. Yes, I'm serious.
5 hours, and many, many "sailor" words later, long after both boys had long since been in the land of slumber, I had my St. Teresa in Ecstasy.
Without further adieu, I present Minion Madness
The boys loved it, and seeing the smiles on their faces this morning made all the hassle worth while.
Happy Halloween Boys!!! You make life FUN!!!!
William
I picked up the pumpkin on Sunday, and after picking up the boys on Monday afternoon from school, we picked out the pattern that would define our masterpiece. After spending at least an hour just creating that image on the pumpkin, we were ready to begin our adventure.
Feeling like Bernini with a block of Marble, I carefully chose my tools. Normally, a small pumpkin saw would do the trick, but not this year. No, no no no no.....this beast would require a Dremel and my clay sculpting tools. Yes, I'm serious.
5 hours, and many, many "sailor" words later, long after both boys had long since been in the land of slumber, I had my St. Teresa in Ecstasy.
Without further adieu, I present Minion Madness
The boys loved it, and seeing the smiles on their faces this morning made all the hassle worth while.
Happy Halloween Boys!!! You make life FUN!!!!
William
Monday, October 21, 2013
A Teacher, A Warden, A Buddy, A Father
You read stories about people that have cheated death, and how much more they value every breathing moment afterward. They see life from a different perspective. Small, trivial, mundane happenings that were once just an afterthought in an otherwise normal day, blossom into vivid, heartfelt memories.
I kind of get that same type of feelings when my weekends with the kids arrive. Each moment is doubled in it's worth. You find yourself relishing whatever role you have to take on at that moment. Sometimes it's a referee.......constantly assessing fairness and doling out penalties when necessary. Sometimes it's a teacher, trying to make sure your children truly understand the lessons that you are trying convey. Sometimes you are buddy, laughing and joking as if a sibling. Most importantly though, you are a father. Ever vigilant, ever protective, ever loving.
Saturday morning we got up early, and after having breakfast, decided to watch The Natural. The Natural happens to be one of my favorite movies of all time. It holds a really dear place in my heart, and it makes me think of my dad every time I watch it. You can imagine how much emotional I was watching it for the first time with both my children. They both loved the movie, and each was jumping around the room during the final scenes. A small thing on an insignificant day, but I guarantee you that I will never forget that moment.
After the movie, we left for Christopher's noon baseball game. I love Christopher's games. It is so much fun coaching these little kids. To see the wonder in their eyes as you explain the very basic fundamentals of the game to them is like hugging innocence. They are just there to have fun. So many times, that portion of our children's games, is just.....absent. Too many expectations from too many people. Not at this age. Not now. Delight just beams from their smiling faces as you tell them "way to go" and give them a high five after barely hitting the ball past the pitcher's mound. You want to stay young? Coach a bunch of 5 and 6 year old kids on game day. Inspirational.
After Christopher's baseball game, we went for a quick lunch at Whataburger. Lori joined us, and we got the boys fed in time for Christopher's 2:00pm soccer game.
We all had fun watching the game, and Christopher's team won the game 7-3. Christopher, played pretty well, but you could tell he was tired from playing a baseball game that ended just an hour before.
We spent the rest of the day at my house playing games and watching sports and movies. It was fun.
Sunday we woke up early and went for donuts. I think one of the most unfair things in life is the fact that donuts taste so good, but are so bad for you. Believe me when I tell you the boys share my philosophy. They could live on donuts if you let them. I could too.....although involuntarily briefly I suppose.
After donuts we rested a bit, and then got Aidan ready for his very special day. Sunday was Aidan's first day of Jr. Cotillion. I got Aidan registered a few weeks back. If you are not familiar with Jr. Cotillion, this link will explain what they teach and why I think it's an important prelude to becoming a well rounded young man.
Frisco Cotillion
Aidan and Christopher and I went shopping for "fancy" clothes last week, and Aidan sure looked handsome in his "preppy" coat and tie.
I was very proud of him, and he had a really good time at the meeting/dance. He and I are both looking forward to the next one.
While Aidan was at Cotillion, Christopher and I went to Dave and Busters fun and games, and had a great time playing in the Midway. Christopher hit quite a few "jackpots" on some of the games of chance, and walked out of there with many neat prizes.
We picked up Aidan on our way home, and grabbed some lunch. After we ate, and let our food settle for a while, I decided to take the boys fishing.
Wow, it had been too long since I went fishing with the boys. Again, doing things like that takes me back to me childhood, and all the days I spent with my brother and dad fishing on lake Belton. Good times my friends......good times.....
The boys had a blast, and so did I. The funny thing is......I didn't even fish. I just helped them with the worms, and had more fun than should be legal just watching their eyes light up when their corks would go under, and they would set those hooks.
How great is that? As a dad, it doesn't get much better.
How did they do? Both caught fish, and both had lots of fun!
Not the biggest fish in the world, but I guarantee you that Christopher didn't care. He was.......pardon the pun..........HOOKED!
A great weekend indeed.
William
I kind of get that same type of feelings when my weekends with the kids arrive. Each moment is doubled in it's worth. You find yourself relishing whatever role you have to take on at that moment. Sometimes it's a referee.......constantly assessing fairness and doling out penalties when necessary. Sometimes it's a teacher, trying to make sure your children truly understand the lessons that you are trying convey. Sometimes you are buddy, laughing and joking as if a sibling. Most importantly though, you are a father. Ever vigilant, ever protective, ever loving.
Saturday morning we got up early, and after having breakfast, decided to watch The Natural. The Natural happens to be one of my favorite movies of all time. It holds a really dear place in my heart, and it makes me think of my dad every time I watch it. You can imagine how much emotional I was watching it for the first time with both my children. They both loved the movie, and each was jumping around the room during the final scenes. A small thing on an insignificant day, but I guarantee you that I will never forget that moment.
After the movie, we left for Christopher's noon baseball game. I love Christopher's games. It is so much fun coaching these little kids. To see the wonder in their eyes as you explain the very basic fundamentals of the game to them is like hugging innocence. They are just there to have fun. So many times, that portion of our children's games, is just.....absent. Too many expectations from too many people. Not at this age. Not now. Delight just beams from their smiling faces as you tell them "way to go" and give them a high five after barely hitting the ball past the pitcher's mound. You want to stay young? Coach a bunch of 5 and 6 year old kids on game day. Inspirational.
After Christopher's baseball game, we went for a quick lunch at Whataburger. Lori joined us, and we got the boys fed in time for Christopher's 2:00pm soccer game.
We all had fun watching the game, and Christopher's team won the game 7-3. Christopher, played pretty well, but you could tell he was tired from playing a baseball game that ended just an hour before.
We spent the rest of the day at my house playing games and watching sports and movies. It was fun.
Sunday we woke up early and went for donuts. I think one of the most unfair things in life is the fact that donuts taste so good, but are so bad for you. Believe me when I tell you the boys share my philosophy. They could live on donuts if you let them. I could too.....although involuntarily briefly I suppose.
After donuts we rested a bit, and then got Aidan ready for his very special day. Sunday was Aidan's first day of Jr. Cotillion. I got Aidan registered a few weeks back. If you are not familiar with Jr. Cotillion, this link will explain what they teach and why I think it's an important prelude to becoming a well rounded young man.
Frisco Cotillion
Aidan and Christopher and I went shopping for "fancy" clothes last week, and Aidan sure looked handsome in his "preppy" coat and tie.
I was very proud of him, and he had a really good time at the meeting/dance. He and I are both looking forward to the next one.
While Aidan was at Cotillion, Christopher and I went to Dave and Busters fun and games, and had a great time playing in the Midway. Christopher hit quite a few "jackpots" on some of the games of chance, and walked out of there with many neat prizes.
We picked up Aidan on our way home, and grabbed some lunch. After we ate, and let our food settle for a while, I decided to take the boys fishing.
Wow, it had been too long since I went fishing with the boys. Again, doing things like that takes me back to me childhood, and all the days I spent with my brother and dad fishing on lake Belton. Good times my friends......good times.....
The boys had a blast, and so did I. The funny thing is......I didn't even fish. I just helped them with the worms, and had more fun than should be legal just watching their eyes light up when their corks would go under, and they would set those hooks.
How great is that? As a dad, it doesn't get much better.
How did they do? Both caught fish, and both had lots of fun!
Not the biggest fish in the world, but I guarantee you that Christopher didn't care. He was.......pardon the pun..........HOOKED!
A great weekend indeed.
William
Monday, October 14, 2013
Oh Boy, Oh Boy, Oh Boy!!!!
I get the boys back today!!!! Woo Hoo!!!
It's been 5 long days since I last had the boys. (It really seems like longer to be honest.) I am now in a state of anticipation.
Today is a school holiday, and all of the students had their parent teacher meetings today. Lori and I met with Christopher's teacher this morning at 9:30am, and it could not have gone better. Christopher is doing wonderful in his class, and he is excelling in everything. I am so proud of him.
After Christopher's meeting, I met Lori and Aidan at his school for Aidan's conference. His was done a bit differently, as he was expected to basically give a presentation to us about his progress. After that, each of his 7 teachers came by our table to meet with us. It also went very well, and Aidan is doing fantastic in school. Again, I could not be more proud.
Since it is Monday, I was scheduled to get the kids, but Dianne (Lori's mother) is in town, so I agreed to let them spend the afternoon visiting with her. It was difficult, because it's been so long since they were over here last, but I just felt like it was the right thing to do. Lori will be dropping them off at the house at 5:00pm this afternoon, and I am certainly looking forward to it.
After they get here, at some time this evening, we are going to go out and get Aidan a Navy Blazer, Khakis, a dress shirt and a tie. He has his first Cotillion on Sunday afternoon, and he is really looking forward to it. To be honest, so am I. It's just another step along the ladder of growing up. It will certainly help him with his manners, and most importantly, teach him to treat and respect girls. The socialization will be great. I of course will have plenty of pictures.
In the mean time, I guess I should pick up the house a little bit in anticipation of the dual hurricanes that are about to hit.
William
It's been 5 long days since I last had the boys. (It really seems like longer to be honest.) I am now in a state of anticipation.
Today is a school holiday, and all of the students had their parent teacher meetings today. Lori and I met with Christopher's teacher this morning at 9:30am, and it could not have gone better. Christopher is doing wonderful in his class, and he is excelling in everything. I am so proud of him.
After Christopher's meeting, I met Lori and Aidan at his school for Aidan's conference. His was done a bit differently, as he was expected to basically give a presentation to us about his progress. After that, each of his 7 teachers came by our table to meet with us. It also went very well, and Aidan is doing fantastic in school. Again, I could not be more proud.
Since it is Monday, I was scheduled to get the kids, but Dianne (Lori's mother) is in town, so I agreed to let them spend the afternoon visiting with her. It was difficult, because it's been so long since they were over here last, but I just felt like it was the right thing to do. Lori will be dropping them off at the house at 5:00pm this afternoon, and I am certainly looking forward to it.
After they get here, at some time this evening, we are going to go out and get Aidan a Navy Blazer, Khakis, a dress shirt and a tie. He has his first Cotillion on Sunday afternoon, and he is really looking forward to it. To be honest, so am I. It's just another step along the ladder of growing up. It will certainly help him with his manners, and most importantly, teach him to treat and respect girls. The socialization will be great. I of course will have plenty of pictures.
In the mean time, I guess I should pick up the house a little bit in anticipation of the dual hurricanes that are about to hit.
William
Thursday, October 10, 2013
Hello Darkness My Old Friend
Once again, the kids are gone for the next five days. Although we have all adjusted well to the schedule that we implemented 15 weeks ago, it still gets very quiet around here during the down time.
Sure I have the opportunity to work on making my business profitable during this down time, and I have lots of time to clean and do all the chores around the house, but nothing beats the stomping and laughing and screaming of inquisitive kids.
I know, I know, "how could you miss the screaming and fighting" is what you ask? Well, as odd as it sounds, you really do. The interaction, whether positive or a teaching moment, is equally missed when you are separated.
Will it ever be different? Will that longing ever go away? In my case, I really doubt it. Christopher and Aidan are just too entwined in my being to ever get comfortable with their absence. Does a person that loses a hand or a foot ever really get over it not being there? Certainly they adapt, they overcome, but they never totally lose the sensation of their lost extremity. When the kids are gone, it's the same type of feeling. You feel their presence even though you know they're not with you. Odd I know, but for me.......eternal.
"Fools", said I, "You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed
In the wells of silence.
William
Sure I have the opportunity to work on making my business profitable during this down time, and I have lots of time to clean and do all the chores around the house, but nothing beats the stomping and laughing and screaming of inquisitive kids.
I know, I know, "how could you miss the screaming and fighting" is what you ask? Well, as odd as it sounds, you really do. The interaction, whether positive or a teaching moment, is equally missed when you are separated.
Will it ever be different? Will that longing ever go away? In my case, I really doubt it. Christopher and Aidan are just too entwined in my being to ever get comfortable with their absence. Does a person that loses a hand or a foot ever really get over it not being there? Certainly they adapt, they overcome, but they never totally lose the sensation of their lost extremity. When the kids are gone, it's the same type of feeling. You feel their presence even though you know they're not with you. Odd I know, but for me.......eternal.
"Fools", said I, "You do not know
Silence like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you"
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed
In the wells of silence.
William
Monday, October 7, 2013
Some Of This, Some Of That
Some of this.
As I told you in my blog about a week ago, I made changes to the final divorce decree I was sent by Lori and her attorney. The changes that I made mimicked exactly the agreements we made and signed on our Rule 11 temporary orders. I sent them back to Lori and her attorney last week with my fingers crossed, and a hoped and a prayed they would be accepted. Accepting them would give us a real chance at closure. Unfortunately for everyone involved, I briefly heard back from my attorney at the end of last week, and he let me know that they were not accepted, and we would now be going on to mediation.
Mediation is ideal for many couples. It allows couples having difficulty finding common ground, a chance to find solutions to many of their problems without having lawyers present. It's just you and your spouse and an unbiased mediator. Well, in my opinion, Lori and I have already done the mediation thing, but without the third party observer. When we were trying to finalize our Rule 11 Temporary orders, we mediated all of our differences, and came to a mutual agreements on all. Like I said in the past, that Rule 11 agreement contained the absolute limit to my concessions. The final divorce decree that I just submitted reflects that limit, so any additional mediation is kind of redundant and might be pointless. There is no way on God's green earth that I am going to agree to seeing my children less that the 48% that I capitulated to on the Rule 11 Temporary Orders.
As our temporary orders stand right now, Lori gets the children 14 more days a year than me. Lori - 189 days......Me - 175 days. I agreed to this in order to find a quick solution to our divorce. I knew by doing so, it would cause the least amount of turmoil in the children's lives, and we could both move on to a much happier place.
Lori's final decree, (the one that I was so disappointed with and made changes to) has a visitation break down like this. Lori - 250 days a year.......Me - 105 days a year. As you can see, that is a ludicrous suggestion, and one that I'm still scratching my head about. All of you have been reading this blog long enough to know how deeply important my children are to me, and how much of a factor and influence I am to their lives. To think that I would agree to that, or that any judge or jury in the world would agree that the children would be better off with that schedule is sheer lunacy. So, unless something drastically changes, after mediation, a long drawn out court battle is next.
Here is a good article about mediation
http://www.mediate.com/articles/jamesb1.cfm
As you can see, the average length of mediation is 3 months, and after that, the average length of a litigated case in the courts is 18 months. Yep, we could still be married until 2015. Think about that. Wow, that stinks.
Some of that.
The boys and I have been having fun for the last few days. The weather has been noticeably cooler, and we have certainly taken advantage. We have been bike riding and spending much more time outside.
I got Aidan signed up to play in a winter basketball league at the YMCA. His team is being coached by two good friends of mine, and two of Aidan's good friends are also on the team. Everything is great, except one small problem.........Aidan has never played organized basketball before. Hmmm.......better start doing something about learning the rules, and the nuances before the season starts in December.
I took both the boys over to the local elementary school on Saturday. We rode our bikes there, and I took along the basketball. While Christopher frolicked on the playground toys, I began teaching Aidan about the game of basketball. He has some work to do before the season, but I think it's going to be super fun in the end. Here he is........Aidan "Nothing but Net" Thornton.
After his basketball lesson, he joined Christopher on the playground. "Hey, let's play follow the leader"
After the game of follow the leader, it was on to "fake like your going to push Christopher off the platform". Oh yeah, that went well......and earned Aidan the "Icy Stare of Death" from Christopher.
Yikes!!!! That even scared me. I believe Aidan was counting on his fingers exactly how long he had to live.
Just before we left, I looked over, and Christopher was letting me know he was ready for his driver's license.
I guess he was practicing for when he purchases that exotic Lamborghini in Italy that only comes in right hand drive. Hey, a boy can dream......right?
Thanks for stopping by, and I'll have another update soon.
William
As I told you in my blog about a week ago, I made changes to the final divorce decree I was sent by Lori and her attorney. The changes that I made mimicked exactly the agreements we made and signed on our Rule 11 temporary orders. I sent them back to Lori and her attorney last week with my fingers crossed, and a hoped and a prayed they would be accepted. Accepting them would give us a real chance at closure. Unfortunately for everyone involved, I briefly heard back from my attorney at the end of last week, and he let me know that they were not accepted, and we would now be going on to mediation.
Mediation is ideal for many couples. It allows couples having difficulty finding common ground, a chance to find solutions to many of their problems without having lawyers present. It's just you and your spouse and an unbiased mediator. Well, in my opinion, Lori and I have already done the mediation thing, but without the third party observer. When we were trying to finalize our Rule 11 Temporary orders, we mediated all of our differences, and came to a mutual agreements on all. Like I said in the past, that Rule 11 agreement contained the absolute limit to my concessions. The final divorce decree that I just submitted reflects that limit, so any additional mediation is kind of redundant and might be pointless. There is no way on God's green earth that I am going to agree to seeing my children less that the 48% that I capitulated to on the Rule 11 Temporary Orders.
As our temporary orders stand right now, Lori gets the children 14 more days a year than me. Lori - 189 days......Me - 175 days. I agreed to this in order to find a quick solution to our divorce. I knew by doing so, it would cause the least amount of turmoil in the children's lives, and we could both move on to a much happier place.
Lori's final decree, (the one that I was so disappointed with and made changes to) has a visitation break down like this. Lori - 250 days a year.......Me - 105 days a year. As you can see, that is a ludicrous suggestion, and one that I'm still scratching my head about. All of you have been reading this blog long enough to know how deeply important my children are to me, and how much of a factor and influence I am to their lives. To think that I would agree to that, or that any judge or jury in the world would agree that the children would be better off with that schedule is sheer lunacy. So, unless something drastically changes, after mediation, a long drawn out court battle is next.
Here is a good article about mediation
http://www.mediate.com/articles/jamesb1.cfm
As you can see, the average length of mediation is 3 months, and after that, the average length of a litigated case in the courts is 18 months. Yep, we could still be married until 2015. Think about that. Wow, that stinks.
Some of that.
The boys and I have been having fun for the last few days. The weather has been noticeably cooler, and we have certainly taken advantage. We have been bike riding and spending much more time outside.
I got Aidan signed up to play in a winter basketball league at the YMCA. His team is being coached by two good friends of mine, and two of Aidan's good friends are also on the team. Everything is great, except one small problem.........Aidan has never played organized basketball before. Hmmm.......better start doing something about learning the rules, and the nuances before the season starts in December.
I took both the boys over to the local elementary school on Saturday. We rode our bikes there, and I took along the basketball. While Christopher frolicked on the playground toys, I began teaching Aidan about the game of basketball. He has some work to do before the season, but I think it's going to be super fun in the end. Here he is........Aidan "Nothing but Net" Thornton.
Just before we left, I looked over, and Christopher was letting me know he was ready for his driver's license.
Thanks for stopping by, and I'll have another update soon.
William
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